The Don't Quit Podcast

The Most Underrated Skill: Listening

Everyone likes to say they’re a good listener. It’s one of those easy traits that everyone has a fundamental level such as I can communicate my words and write down words. Similarity though, people also say they’re a good driver but is that really the case?

People think listening is about doing 3 things:

* Not talking when others are speaking

* Giving non-verbal cues that you are listening such as nodding your head

* Being able to repeat what was said

In theory this sounds good but put into the test as faults that don’t work out.

A study of over 3,000 people in help of making better managers i business have found out that differences in listening abilities goes down into 4 categories.

Being able to listen well is more than just being silent while the other person talks. Actually people believe the best listeners are able to ask questions that are engaging to the current topic.

Just nodding your head doesn’t give the most accurate evidence that someone is listening, but asking a good question is all the proof they need to make it work. Listening is essentially a 2-way street rather than a person who’s hearing vs a person who speaking. Good conversations are active ones.

From the studies, good listening is also a reflection of a person’s self- esteem. By being a positive experience has made conversations more engaging and overall more pleasant to comprehend. So by not talking a critical tone has helped people listen better.

Another section was good listening is about cooperation. In a good interaction, feedback moved back in forth smoothly. While in poor listeners were seen as better debaters but not in a cooperative manner that results in a better conclusion. It’s not about winning an argument but helping to resolve any problems.

Lastly, good listeners make good suggestions. Feedback is a wonderful way for us to improve as people. Good listening skills are no different in that in order to know the correct paths and the self awareness to know how.

With the power of suggestions allows us to stop jumping to conclusion and address the situation. Similarity trying to be a sponge in a conversation that sucks up the info but doesn’t really doesn’t contribute out.

Instead good listeners are like trampolines. It’s about the ideas you bounce off from rather than absorbing it. Gaining energy and height from a conversation is exactly what makes a good listener.

Each of these sections of listening can build off of each other. So if you’ve been criticized for jumping to conclusions it’s because you’re not using all different uses of listening.

Now with this knowledge you can now understand exactly what is being said and how to contribute it in a productive and effective way. Not only does this enhance our own wisdom but makes you a better person to talk to.

So let’s start more conversations together.

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